Manu Dibango at The Barbican

Cameroon's best export the legendary Manu Dibango shows no signs of slowing down as he celebrates turning 80 with a gig at the Barbican on 26th November.
For more information and to purchase tickets, click here.

He's taking a piss...literally

What a surprise seeing a generously proportioned XY chromosome easing themselves by the road; in full view of moving traffic and not a care in the world.
Growing up in Cameroon, I got accustomed to men casually stopping by the roadside, letting Mr Wonky out for a long spray on the grass, then a little vigorous shake at Wonky post splattering the environment with toxins; then Wonky gets carefully packed in, inside its shabby cockroach holed underpants (boss-boss dross) as Wonky's owner nonchalantly taps his unwashed hands by his side discarding off any 'spill-over' during aiming; then continues his business striding along with the geste of a lame prince...not a care in the world.
Unwashed wee hands eager to fondle a willing bird. One of the reasons I don't like greeting men! Anyway! So I did a double take seeing a man taking a piss...literally, by the road.

Response to anti-illegal immigration bus campaign

Dear Mr Cameron and your Cabinet of Millionaires, 
If you want to curb immigration and send back all illegal immigrants from Africa, I suggest you consider giving a relocation allowance of £50K, providing meat and beer on the return flights home. 
This will solve the problem instantly...not this bus advert campaign! Whose idea was that? Was it conjured over a game of cards at Number 10 or what? It is too simplistic. Even the EDL could do better in sending away these immigrants who clean your hospitals and pick your tomatoes. 
By the way I hope your chipped tooth is much improved? Hoping the whole tooth comes out eventually leaving you with an ugly dental gap; as ugly as this advert.
Yours Sincerely, 
An African Migrant.

Royal Baby given African names

BREAKING NEWS: The Royal Couple have broken with tradition by giving the Royal Baby African names, in a nod to Her Majesty's firm grasp over several former colonies namely Cameroon, Nigeria and Ghana. The Akan people of Ghana are famed for naming children after the day they were born.Therefore, the third in-line to the throne, Prince Cambridge, will be known as HRH Kojo Oluwafemi Oluwola Fru Che Windsor. Clarence House has confirmed the Queen has given royal approval for the couple to break with protocol.

President Paul Biya celebrates 80th birthday

• Cameroon's octogenarian leader celebrated turning 80 with family and close friends
• Clutching a bouquet of roses, Mr Biya said he felt "ox-strong" and 80 was the new 40
• Thanked Cameroonians for their support throughout his uncontested three decade rule

The low key affair which took place on the 13th February at Unity Palace gave the public a rare glimpse into the private life of Mr Biya and his rather modest surroundings at the presidential abode.
Set in a Valentine's Day theme, the brash party décor was no doubt a reminder to the all important fact  Mr Biya was born on Valentine's Day Eve, lest we forget. 

A close aide from Unity Palace who wished to remain anonymous said the presidential duo had wanted something discreet without the hallmarks of an over indulgent wealthy family trapped in a gaudy display of their ill acquired riches.

The gigantic five tier cake with  two red hearts etched at the front stood on a table adorned with huge bouquets of red roses and pink petals. Large golden candles rested on either side and in case you forgot how old the octogenarian truly was, a blue candle with the number 80 stood atop the cake.

Mr Biya  and his red roses. Forget wearing your heart on your sleeve, Mr Biya's is on the table

The presidential couple showed their frivolous side in this dire economic times as the golden candles used for Mr Biya's birthday cake were recycled from the First Lady's birthday celebrations back in December.

A recession dip celebration as recycled candles from Chantal Biya's  birthday back in December were used

The couple are flanked by their children Brenda (L) and Paul Jr (R)

Real men don't give roses, they receive them

The modest surroundings of Unity Palace

President Paul Biya addresses Cameroonians on Yaounde killings

The spate of gruesome attacks on young girls in Cameroon's capital has prompted the president to hold an emergency conference with government officials addressing the issue.

President Biya  was consumed with emotions as he addressed Cameroonians

Yaounde has been thrown in a state of panic and wide alert over the past fortnight as mutilated corpses of girls as young as 15-years, have been dumped on the streets. Fears of ritual killings have shocked the vibrant city as these bodies have had body parts such as eyes, genitals,breasts, etc removed.

In a speech to the nation addressing distressed Cameroonians, President Biya promised to track those behind such "vile" attacks and to "treat them like the dogs they are." The president cast a forlorn shadow as he pledged emphatically to Cameroonians such heinous crimes will not  go unpunished. Racked by emotions, Mr Biya paused from time to time to wipe a tear which occasionally fell on his perspired glistened cheeks. Borrowing the words of  British Prime Minister David Cameron, Mr Biya assured Cameroonians "We are all in this together."

President Biya's speech on Yaounde ritual killings:

"Our country is in  mourning. When I heard the news of the attacks on these vulnerable young girls I instantly thought about my own daughter. As a parent, I was filled with indescribable sorrow at their  young lives cut so short.
"Learning of the horrors inflicted on their bodies left me with a feeling of distraught and a sadness which still tugs at my heart. I cannot understand how such corrupt criminals live amongst us. Such wickedness in mankind. Have we no  love for our own people we treat them like common stray dogs?
"What will possess one to act in such a cold calculated way towards a fellow human being? A defenceless young girl? I have asked myself these questions over and over again with no answers.
" My heart goes out to the affected families and I want to assure you we shall track those behind these vile attacks and treat them like the dogs they are. They shall not go free.
"You are not alone. We are all in this together. All of Cameroon mourns with you."

Accompanied by the First Lady Chantal Biya, the presidential duo appeared thoroughly shaken at the events. The usually glamorous Mrs Biya looked pale beyond recognition in a faded CPDM kaba (maxi gown) and badly sewn blond greffe (wig) which unashamedly showed her unrelaxed black roots. The contrast between the blond greffe and her charcoal dark roots created a rather unpolished look for a woman widely regarded on the international scene as Africa's First Lady of Fashion.

It is the first time President Biya has addressed the nation over such an incident. He has been accused in the past of being a ghost leader holed up in the anal cavities of France's president or hiding away in his numerous French Châteaux, completely disconnected from the plight of his people. However Mr Biya appears to prove his critics wrong as a more compassionate side to him has emerged.

Polls conducted by Cameroon's reliable news sources placed him firmly in favour with most Cameroonians who feel they have never had a better president, given the multitude of presidents the country has had.

Study for FREE in London with a two year Masters in Social Work bursary

A list of professions eligible for a bursary similar to what nurses receive has been added on the NHS student bursary website. Now you can have your fees paid for with a living and expenses stipend if you are going to train as a: dietician, chiropodist, physiotherapists, radiographer,speech and language therapists, etc

Check the website here for a range of options available.

To be legible, you need to meet residency requirements.

Cameroonian 'engineer' builds helicopter

A Cameroonian man has made history by becoming the first man to build a helicopter single handedly. Mustafa, from Kumbo- Banso, showed innovative determination in his state of the art zinc designed helicopter.

The Mayor of Kumbo supports Mustapha in his ground breaking achievment to be, as the helicopter is still to do its maiden voyage...off the ground.

Why do black African men (dis) respect black African women?

Why is the black African man discourteous and immodest towards black African women? You show brazen arrogance and lack of respect treating black African women like shoddy inferior beings.

Why do you approach me in a busy Waitrose displaying territorial arrogance- me a customer doing my Saturday shopping, you a security guard/cleaner working in the shop to make connaissance?

I am well dressed and a respectable woman with a busy day ahead. You seek me out amongst the sea of thronging shoppers to make your acquaintance known, smiling like a sheepish fool as you boldly ask: 
"Excuse me where are you from?"

Don't you know it's rude to ask someone you have never met and don't know such a question? Is that your icebreaker? Well it is a feeble one and needs to be revised. Resisting the need to respond with a sarcastic "I am from my mother's womb," I answer your question despite my annoyance at a security guard/cleaner getting so comfortable with customers. I proceed to swiftly move away when you follow me and in another act of insolent audacity, you request that I invite you over and "cook fufu", as that is the "main meal of my people." 

Would you be so forward if I was a white woman? How dare you familiarise yourself with me? On what account? What is your basis? Water seeks its own level.

What goes on in your head when you see me standing by the rainy sidewalk, shielding from the rain with an umbrella- you approach me with such arrogant impudence and say: 

"Kan a jan you unda diya umbralla?" My trained Pidgin English ears pick up your rudimentary English to mean "Can I join you under that umbrella?" Oh goodness gracious me! The sheer effrontery! 

Would you be so forward if I was a white woman? How dare you familiarise yourself with me? On what account? What is your basis? Water seeks its own level.

What demon has possessed you when at a funeral reception we all stand in line making small talk as we wait for our turn to the buffet table; you appear from the back end of the rather long queue and interrupt our discussion with no excuses, introducing yourself as " Mr XYZ, Consultant Cardiologist" and then jump the queue to the buffet table. What kind of educated uneducated moron are you?  Your Doctorship is a leeway to jump a funeral reception food queue? Many of you get degrees without actually getting an education.

Why do you approach me ignoring the ring I have on my wedding finger? Yes I am really engaged/married and in a committed relationship. Why will I be wearing a ring on that finger? Why can't you respect that and stop henpecking me? Why can't you take no for answer when you show interest and I respond with zilch attention? It hurts your ego? What about my wishes? Be a man and respect my wishes. Be a man and respect women.

Why do you get my number through unsolicited means inundating me with text messages? You lie to a mutual friend you had permission to obtain my number. Shocked and angry at such an intrusion into my privacy, I mince no words in telling you off, requesting that you don't contact me. If I really wanted to be in-touch, I would have given you my number. The result: you launch into a tirade of vitriol and abuse advising me to get my head checked.

Why do you approach me at a party and immediately launch a police investigation into my immigration status? As UKBA’s Chief Detective, you ask how long I have lived in the UK, if I have been to other countries, etc. You think I don't know you want to do the maths and add up my resident status so you can eventually plot your way to doki?

Why do you whistle when we walk down the streets belittling us with vulgar remarks and making sexual gestures? Would you want your sister, mother or daughter to be a recipient of such sexual harassment?

Why do you the African black man conduct yourself in such unrefined. caustic, rustic manner? The Ph.D holders to secondary school leavers all morph as one behaving like uncouth louts. You have no etiquette or manners and assume familiarity with all classes. 

Would you be so forward if I was a white woman? How dare you familiarise yourself with me? On what account? What is your basis?

Familiarity breeds contempt.

Divorced Cameroonian women: the social outcast

In an age where tweeting isn't just confined to birds and everyone is an author courtesy of virtual publishing house Facebook, divorce is still a social taboo in Cameroon with women getting the blame and facing the brunt of this unholy act.

Forget breast ironing, child abuse or  FGM;  the real danger to the 21st century Cameroonian woman is divorce. Oh that dreaded word divorcee! Secret whispers swish by as you walk followed by looks of pity, then the disapproving glances from men as used goods or the gracious adjective "Na stronghead woman." In plain English, she's a stubborn mare so beware.

Yes, being a Cameroonian divorcee is what red wine is to a white dress: an obvious embarrassing stain. A grievous sin which can lead to excommunication from social circles at all levels. It is on par with being a loose woman and the village bicycle.

A few weeks ago I was speaking to a friend who bemoaned her social fate of being a divorcee amongst her group of married church going friends- The Faithful Wives. At a social event, as my newly single friend interacted with other bachelors, she unwittingly incurred the wrath of The Faithful Wives. So horrified where they at her boldness to mix freely with other men immediately after the event, a member of The Faithful Wives phoned my friend expressing her disgust and dismay at her socialising with men.
" But I am not married," said my friend.
"Yes I know but it's not right for you to be seen talking to these men." Insisted the Faithful Wife.
"And why is that? I am a single woman. Those men were single. Is there some biblical law which forbids single members of the opposite sex from engaging in conversation with each other?" asked my shocked friend.
The conversation went around in aimless circles much to the annoyance of my friend.
"You should have asked her if she was a pure white rose when she got married," I said.

Needless to say, the committee of Faithful Wives have since distanced themselves from the sinning unholy woman. Whatever will Christ say if he found them socialising with sinners! (This is the same Jesus Christ who dined with outcasts  {Mark 2 :13-17} telling the righteous yet he who hasn't sinned be the first to throw a stone {John 8:4-8})

Cameroonian women remain extremely marginalised in Cameroon despite the plethora of degrees Cameroonians tend to acquire in their pursuit of lifetime education abroad. The Oxford, Cambridge or Princeton graduate gets a degree without an education. They remain steadfast in their primordial primitive misogynist way of thought.
 As they say in Pidgin English, "e go through school but school no pass through e."

Women still get the blame for everything that went wrong in a marriage as she should have "stuck it out for the children." Ironically, staying in a relationship which has run its course is harmful for the children. Getting out is the healthy thing to do for you and the children. You don't go through psychological turbulence for the sake of a happy home. You get out of it to raise your children in a safe and happy environment.
Unless otherwise you wish to pander to the meandering flimsy demands of our rather Neanderthal society with its archaic values, that reprimands divorcees as the lousy woman always at fault; so you stay neck deep in a troubled sinking partnership for keeping up appearances.

Who are you catering to? The Cameroon society and its whimsical demands or your personal health and happiness?  The choice is yours.

Happy Birthday to Chantal Biya, Cameroon's First Lady

Cameroon's golden couple of politics came together this week to celebrate the First Lady turning 42-years old.

Mrs Biya whose magpie sense of glamour is hugely overlooked and should be celebrated in the fashion world, looked demure in a mustard fitted dress. The First Lady of all First Ladies looked an endless fountain of youth as she was surrounded by family to celebrate the joyous occasion.

The diverse mix of ethnic celebrants at the intimate family occasion showed just how ethnically diversified Cameroon. The country is known for its hospitality to foreigners as the government often lets non Cameroonians namely Chinese and Asians trade and invest in the economy up to seven years tax free.

Beaming with child-like glee as she posed with her birthday gifts against the backdrop of two white mammoth Christmas trees decorated elaborately with glittery balls and tinsel, Mrs Biya and her husband looked a perfect picture of harmony.

With a glowing complexion which would put girls half her age to shame, the birthday girl had her natural hair held back in loose curls as she smiled for the cameras; standing by a giant size three tier pink cake normally commissioned by the glamorous brides of My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding. 

Definitely all money and  class!

Many more years of fruition to the First Lady of First Ladies. Who needs Michelle Obama?

The case of the interfering peace dove who really brings war

I haven't updated the blog in a very long time...this is because I am currently working on different projects at the moment- but will try and update perhaps once or twice a month. Not sure if I had any avid readers but if I did, accept my unreserved apologies. 

Meanwhile isn't it sad that over 1000 Libyans have been dead with arms purchased from the UK since 2004? Amidst rumours from news sources that Tony Blair acted as an advisor to Gaddafi after leaving  Number 10. The LSE accepted £300,000 from the Gaddafi regime...in fact the UK had accepted money from Gaddafi when they sold him ammunition! So who really is responsible for a non immunised rabies infected dog running amok biting children? The owner or the dog? And isn't it even sadder that we now see France, Supper Nanny UN, etc meddling with the affairs of Ivory Coast? Ivory Coast is on the brink of a Civil War because once again Western powers are interfering in the state of African affairs: they know the cost of everything and the value of nothing. An African life is so valueless to these Western pimps who like slave masters of old flog off African leaders against one another for the highest bid...in this case Alasane Outtara who is now the faithful preened African French chihuahua. Can I hear a  French bark?... "ouf! ouf!"

It is highly ironical that whenever the West appears as a peace bearing dove regions descend into anarchy. Do you remember Iraq before American invasion? It had a despotic ruler yet 'relatively' peaceful. There were no routine bombings across the country.Bombings have now become solely implanted in the day to day life of Iraqis.The number of murdered Iraqis remains unclear and I very much doubt if there exists a family in Iraq who hasn't lost a loved one to this senseless war which was set out solely to gratify the selfish desire of George Bush II. Bush Sr took America to war and so did Bush Jr: a family with more blood on their hands than Charles Taylor yet the world ignores these two criminals. Shouldn't The Hague question Bush and Blair on the purpose of this war?...So many questions and no answers. Until next time, my Big Mouth is temporary closed.  

Politicians are like babies constantly requiring a nappy change because they are always full of s**t.

David Cameron visits Egypt with EIGHT Arm dealers in tow

"The UK Government prioritises the interests of arms companies – it makes a mockery of claiming to have a rigorous approach to arms sales. People in the Middle East are dying in an attempt to get democracy and yet Cameron and other ministers are still selling weapons used to oppress them." 

Sarah Waldron-Campaign Against the Arm Trade

SHAM-eron with Egypt's Field Marshall Tantawi perhaps sealing an arms deal. Picture DailyMail

David Cameron became the first world leader to visit Egypt since the political impotent and demented  Hosni Mubarak was ousted from power.Mr SHAM-eron took along eight British Arms firms on his trip to promote democracy in the Arab world.They include top bosses from BAE, Rolls-Royce, QinetiQ, Cobham Group,Ultra Electronics,Atkins,Babcock International and Thales. Cameron's visit with Arm dealers in tow shows gross disrespect to memories of hundreds of dead Egyptians massacred a few weeks ago in their fight for democracy (with arms most likely procured from the West). Dust has barely settled on graves, mourning still goes on for those who lost loved ones yet SHAM-eron is already quick to secure the sale of more arms to Egypt. His scandalous behaviour is no different from a widow/widower having intimate liaisons with others as the dead partner lays cold dead in a coffin next door. 

The defence minister Gerald Howarth along with 50 British companies are currently attending an Arms exposition in the UAE also attended by Libyan officials.While hundreds lay lying in cold blood in the streets of Libya, Britain is attending and perhaps even negotiating more deals in the arm trade. Are you sick to your stomach at the morbid actions of men in the upper political echelon because I am such that no amount of anti-emetic can offer relief. 

Just this afternoon, SHAM-eron gave a speech from Kuwait  denouncing the attacks  and violence in Libya as "completely unacceptable"  A violence indirectly promoted by the sale of arms & ammunition from Britain to Libya Mr Prime Minister!. The last few days have seen mass carnage of Libyans as they dared stood up to GaddaFIRE's 42 year old tyrannical despotic rule.Britain has been involved in the trade of arms to Libya since 2004 and just as recently as the last general elections sold tear gas, sniper riffles and crowd control ammunition to Libya. The hyprocrtical  message of democracy Britain appears to promotes is enough to knock senseless any democracy activist with anger and gross disbelief.

If  world leaders have peace and democracy as top priority over shady oil deals with autocratic regimes; there will be an immediate end to the sale of firearms to authoritarian,oppressive regimes in Middle Eastern and African countries. The real terrorists are political brain dead inept tyrannical leaders from these nations set loose to run amok like mad dogs, just because they possess oil rich land fields and other natural reserves.

First read in The Independent,Business Week and The Daily Mail

Quote of the Day

 Always live in the moment.
Appreciate what you are given.
Take risks, love recklessly and live happily.Follow your heart to the fullest.Do not dwell on regrets. 

And just when the Caterpillar thought it's life was over, it became a butterfly. 

(Source:various positive reads)

Berlusconi to face sex trial presided by THREE female Judges

Silvio Berlusconi: Mafia sleaze sex ball will finally face sex charges on 6th April having his fate decided by three female judges. Talk about Girl Power. He stands accused of having sexual liaisons with an under age Moroccan prostitute- the then 17year old Karima el-Mahroug; and abuse of power after placing a  personal phone call to a police station where Ms El-Mahroug was being held on accusations of theft.In the ensuing phone call, BerlusHorny asked for her immediate release stating she was the grand-daughter of then President Mubarak. The demands were hastily met.

BerlusCorny is a permatan smooth pimp dressed in expensive well cut suits shielding behind his political power and wealth. How he has managed to dodge prosecution from these sex scandals since 2009 is baffling.His 17year political career has been beleaguered with countless bribery and corruption cases which he somehow mystically always got acquitted. The timeless African proverb '99 days for the thief and one day for the owner' springs to mind.

The Moroccan prostitute now 18, denies being paid for sex. Of course a prostitute turns up at BerlusHorny's well known bunga bunga parties and they discuss politics whilst nibbling on canapes and sipping caviar all night...just as David Cameron is a descendant of West African migrants. Bungling political mess.

This sexual predator should stand down immediately as PM.He is a discredit to the term Italian Stallion.

Alleged to have used/using women to satisfy his carnal desires,he will now face three of them to explain why or how he did didn't.

If found guilty, BerlusHorny faces up to 15years in prison.

First Read in The Guardian

XXL Americans go on a NO diet to Michelle Obama's healthy eating stimulus

Our English cousins over the pond are content with eating themselves fat to a stupor given recent back lashes faced by healthy eating campaigners such as Jamie Oliver & U.S. First Lady Mrs Obama. For getting our beloveth eat healthy is as arduous a task as having an elephant fit into a size 0 tankini: unworkable. It is Utopian to imagine XXL Americans accept any healthy eating stimulus of any sort if it isn't deep fried,pan fried,or sizzling oozing with tons of fat slapped in ketchup and Dijon mustard. Jamie Oliver's TV show on the ABC network earlier on this year showed children in America's fattest city: Huntington-West Virginia; mistaking vine tomatoes as potatoes...

The First Lady Michelle Obama's 'Lets Move!' initiative (aimed at tackling America's disgraceful ever rising childhood obesity rate) last Wednesday celebrated it's first anniversary and to mark this; our graceful cousins produced a caricature mocking Mrs Obama as an overweight woman stuffing  her face with mountain pile hamburgers besides a twig thin salad eating Mr Obama.The cartoons are of poor taste and highlight how myopic Americans are over such an important issue clogging up their coronary health.

17% of  American children and adolescents between 2-19 years are obese(CDC). Two thirds of Americans are obese with the overall burden of the disease costing $147million per anum(CBS News). It is greatly disturbing to see Mrs Obama's campaign being ridiculed as such.The untreatable wart of American politics with a vacuous space where her brain should be(Sarah Pack-It-In) voiced her fatuous concerns over the Obesity campaign remarking 'What (Michelle Obama) is telling us is she cannot trust parents to make decisions for their own children, for their own families in what we should eat.' Well given the rate and burden of current childhood obesity...clearly not. Perhaps the First Lady should try deep frying 'Lets Move!' in litres of fat and serve them on a bed of American fries accompanied by XXL can of pop. This may just get the attention of our XXL cousins.

First Read inThe Daily Mail

Colonial Love & an Illicit Affair

 "Cameroon and France are entangled at the hips like two illegal lovers caught in the throes of passion". Mambo

"Independent" yet steadfastly walks to tune of whitemen in suits amidst protests(crushed tomatoes)

Despite being freed from colonial rule over half a century ago; Cameroon and its citizens (myself a prime example) remain nothing but a by product of neocolonialism and Francofrog French policy of Assimilation. We need to be soaked in fresh spring waters of  Afrocentrism and hung out to dry in pegs of Identity Awareness.

Mongo Beti 1932-2001 Political Writer

Cameroonian writer- Mongo Beti: who heavily mocked the iron grip Croaking French Toads had over Cameroon alluded in his 1972 novel : Main basse sur le Cameroun, autopsie d'une décolonisation ('Cruel hand on Cameroon, autopsy of a decolonization') what we all know: Cameroon is still steadfastly tied to the apron strings of its former colonial master.What a right French twist that is! One only needs to take a look at how a French twist is achieved at the hairdressers to know what a baking hot mess Cameroon is entangled in. 

We have been proud to associate ourselves with term Françafrique- a word coined by the French Puppet Houphouët-Boigny of Côte d'Ivoire to represent the friendship between France and her slaves African allies. However it is a vulgar, debasing term which signifies degradation and neocolonialism at its peak. Just as it is wrong to call a black man 'nigger', except  for dumb tattooed tramps aka rappers: so to should  it be wrong in using this term  to talk about Afro-Franco relations. French Economist François Xavier Verschave couldn't have given a more apt description as to the meaning of Françafrique: "The secret criminality in the upper echelons of French politics and economy, where a kind of underground Republic is hidden from view" The word is dangerously close to sounding like France in Africa. Don't we all know France is in Africa anyway?Somehow Geographers continuously err in placing her in Europe. 

The worst kept secret in the history of Cameroon's "fair" elections is the fact that everyone knows they are anything but "fair".A Cameroon election to be "fair" is like asking Chantal Biya to ditch the weave and adopt a more natural look- a far cry from her 1st Drag Queen of Africa status. It is like saying Polar bears have voted summer over winter. Blooming heck they did! The immoral harlot that is France has never questioned the fair election system of it's lover yet all monkeys were set loose to trash the banana plantation over Ivory Coast's election rigging. Gbabgo is not a string puppet like Houphouët-Boigny. He refuses to eat from your palms and the world including Super Nanny UN intervenes. The toothless bull dog OAU barks but has no teeth to bite.In fact it is so useless it's bark will not awaken a one week old sleeping infant.
  

The illicit love affair between France & Cameroon, borne during colonialism as far back as 1919 orchestrated under the auspices of the League of Nations needs to stop.The many illegitimate off springs from this affair have done nothing  but deteriorate Cameroon's economy faster than a mudslide. Southern Cameroon acted like thoroughly doubly blindfolded mice on the 1st October 1961 as she voted away her last shred of freedom and dignity to join French Cameroon...willingly selling her soul to servitude as the FrancoToad's mistress.

'We politely referred to as “underdeveloped,” in truth are colonial,semi-colonial or dependent countries'. Che Guevara.

Quote of the Day

“Between men and women there is no friendship possible. There is passion, enmity, worship, love, but no friendship.” - Oscar Wilde

My favourite Oscar Wilde tale of all times is The Fisherman & His Soul. A tragic story of true love- a man loveth so deep that his soul he doth gaveth up for love.  

'Love is better than wisdom, and more precious than riches, and fairer than the feet of the daughters of men. The fires cannot destroy it, nor can the waters quench it'. (The Fisherman to his dead love; the Mermaid).Here is a link to the story and many of Oscar Wilde's tales.The Fisherman & His Soul

PS: Doesn't Oscar Wilde look like Jonathan Ross?

Arrested for "theft by finding" after picking up discarded food

A 21 year old woman has been arrested and charged with theft by finding after helping herself to food items worth £200 thrown out by supermarket giant Tesco. Sasha Hall from Essex who earns £600 a month thought manna had fallen from heaven when her local Tesco Express in Great Baddow threw food up to the amount of £3000 after a power cut. The police who have nothing better to do than terrorise cash strapped hungry citizens later arrived at Ms Hall's domicile threatening to break open her door. She was then promptly handcuffed, arrested like a hardened criminal and will appear in front of Magistrates on February the 16th charged with theft by finding. Talk about the misappropriation of tax payers money to make such a useless arrest while yobs run amok on our streets!

What is theft by finding?

The complexity of English Law renders The Riemann Hypothesis almost solved. The Theft Act of 1968 1(1) defines theft as:  "A person is guilty of theft if he dishonestly appropriates property belonging to another with the intention of permanently depriving the other of it; and ‘theft’ and ‘steal’ shall be construed accordingly". 3(1) of the same act also states : "Any assumption by a person of the rights of an owner amounts to an appropriation, and this includes, where he has come by the property (innocently or not) without stealing it, any later assumption of a right to it by keeping or dealing with it as owner"  And there you have your meaning of theft by finding. However in this case Ms Hall did not appropriate property given that when Tesco threw out the food: Tesco forfeited its right to that property so it stops being a property of Tesco's.It is tantamount to picking up food in a rubbish bin. How is that theft by finding when the said property is not property owned? What next? Arresting people for scouring the scrap yard? Perhaps if the Met Police have finished dealing with crime off our streets they should shoe shine their shoes to a mirror reflection instead of wasting tax payers money on such incongruous arrests. Tesco should be arrested for its diabolical food waste and its ever soaring prices handcuffed permanently to a price halt. 

First Read in The Daily Mail

What if Lindsay Lohan was Lakeisha Tejani Harem

I couldn't help but wonder for one second what if Miss PoutyTrout Lindsay Lohan was Lakeisha Tejani Harem.

• She would have been denied bail and immediately sent to jail.
• If at all granted bail it would have surpassed the measly $40,000 Lohan's was set at.
• All offers of work would instantly melt away faster than icicles in scorching heat.
• Lakeisha of course would have been portrayed by the dominantly Caucasian run press as a good for  nothing coke head violent uncontrollable woman with a myriad of evils as an accompanying character.

Lohan is almost glorified as the ultimate cool glamorous blond b**** . Her trophies of misdemeanours include:

• DUI
• Cocaine consumption
• Attacking a Betty Ford employee
• Various theft allegations ranging from $12,000mink coat,$400,000 necklace from a fashion shoot, $3,500 Rolex, and the most recent $2,500 gold necklace.

Time and time again this blond trout escapes the hooks and nets of the law or are the fishermen deliberately casting nets with huge hole sizes in the murky sea world of celebrity,fame and money? You  have a clear CCTV footage of this thief leaving the shop with a stolen item and the case is in court? That makes a huge mockery of the law.If that had  been a poor woman from Brooklyn or whatever countless ghetto areas there exist in America, her chances of getting away with a slap on the wrist would have been as feasible as Hell flooding. 
It is hugely ironical that  the law which is meant to bring justice to all; instead highlights the mass injustice and inequality between normal non celebrity mortals and untouchable celebrity mortals.

Think twice if you are poor and commit a crime...

And needless to say you need a year out to assess and think thoroughly if you are black.